10 Reasons I Like Tookie

He licks his butt hole when he's soiled

These are the most of main reasons I like my cat, Tookie:

10. He is as charming as his teeth and claws are sharp (extremely)

9. When we adopted him he came with a pre-paid calling card

8. He will often times vomit up figure 8 patterns of the lunch meats he begs for

7. He parades around on clean counter-tops immediately after using his litter box

6. His idea of a nice gift is something freshly disemboweled and still living

5. If it weren’t for the lid on his litter box, he would sit on the edge of the box and sh&t on the floor

4. He can scale buildings and properly uses a doggie door

3. He helps break in new furniture by shredding, shedding, and throwing up on it

2. His favorite game is cut throat

and finally…

1. He drinks from the toilet no matter what’s in it