2009 December » Wolsamnoraa's Blog

Medical Marijuana

Half-ass, Life Lessons, Story, The Future 4 Responses »

Dec 302009

Weed will cure what? Um, what?

Recently, there has been an influx of marijuana clinics and advertisements popping up around town. They make it seem like you could waltz in and buy a pack of marijuana cigarettes, no problem. You might not even need to be sick. To be honest, I’m curious (and sick?) but I haven’t smoked pot since my first pubes surfaced from my armpits nearly ten years ago. After this embarrassing incident, I don’t know if I could smoke again.

It all went down like this…Some friends and I were going to attend the 93.3 FM’s summer music concert series, the Big Gig or Big Adventure or something like that. I remember 311 was there and that’s why I was excited. From my friend’s accounts of that day, Incubus, The Long Beach Dub All Stars and (for the sake of exaggeration) David Bowie were performing, too. (No surprise, I didn’t remember any of that because I was so stoned)

In preparation for the big event, we took a short drive to Fechter’s house to chief big smoke. He had a three foot bong and a hefty sack of smoker friendly weed. So we traveled to the house and ripped bong hits until the sack ran out. I was catching a ride with a neighbor to the concert, so after getting high and eating three bags of Funyuns, I had to venture home.

Being the responsible teenager I was, I designated myself the driver and drove home slowly, waiting for every “stop” sign to turn green. When I eventually got home, I was just in time to see another car pull into my driveway. As I inched into my parking spot, a woman, let’s call her Mom, stepped out of her car and watched as I fumbled to act naturally.

As she waited and watched me from the top of the drive way, I cautiously slipped out of my car smiling. I started to close the door behind me but realized the car was still running. I slowly slipped back into the driver seat and turned off the engine. I waived to her and said I was going to the neighbor’s house so that I could catch a ride to the show.

Mom stopped me and said, “Why don’t you come over here and give Mom a hug.” I moseyed up to her and she pulled me in tightly and whispered in my ear, “Are you stoned?” For the first time in hours, I quickly moved away and hustled to my neighbor’s house. It was humiliating and, afterwards, I decided to never smoke weed again.

Now all of these billboards and bus stop ads are making me question if I could get away with smoking again. They’ve made it seem almost unillegal (or legal for all of you English scholars). I’m tempted to try it again, and can’t quite figure what’s at stake.

What do you think? After my dizzying experience and the likelihood that nothing bad could come from the situation, should I try it again? Or should I walk away real slow like?

Dream Analysis

Animal, Life Lessons, Tookie No Responses »

Dec 282009

I’ve been having these really weird dreams. They’re vivid and sometimes they’re kind of freaky.

Last night I had one where I was walking around in my condo and stepped on some nails. The nails popped right out of the top of my foot and I was bleeding all over the carpet and then the carpet turned into a sea of nipples. Another dream I’ve had was one where I’m in line at a Taco Bell drive-thru and someone asks if I want hot sauce.

These dreams seem so real. But because I half a logical brain, I’m able to deduce that they’re not real. For instance, I know the Taco Bell excursion was a dream because I couldn’t find a receipt for tacos, nor were there any left over hot sauce packets or napkins. Additionally, my bowels seemed to be intact and in normal working order the next three days which is evidence that I never ate any damn tacos.

Anyway, I was curious as to what these dreams all mean so I kept a journal of them and looked up the meanings. Discovering each translation was like opening a bitter fortune cookie. Here is a short list of dreams I can remember having over the last week:

Blue tea kettle in an open microwave – Something mysterious will happen to my testicles
My older brother – I stand to lose my hair
Jared Hood’s (childhood friend) old kitchen – Success followed by failure

Dreaming of Taco Bell can only mean one thing; Gay

Hamster/gerbil – Abundance/scarcity

Gift from my older brother – A sign of heartbreaking love
A golfer – Traveling a great distance by goat
My car – Putting a lot of money into a “sinking ship”
Open car windows – Making a new friend who steals from me
Desert – Sexy new beginnings with cacti

Mattresses – Support from gloved ones
Parking lot – Finding meaning in life
The YMCA – I’m gay?
Kindness of stranger named Angie who goes by Anne – Penetration by sword or writing tool
A baby – Impending doom
My cat, Tookie – Terrible, hurtful things

Traveling by car – Diabetes
My mother – Birth of a relative
A piercing through my inner ear – Successful homicide

Bear Creek High School (the name and the physical site) – I will go horseback riding soon
Toilets outside – A plentiful garden
Pooping – Transitioning from one part of my life to another
Wiping but not being able to clean it – Lying to the people I love
Best friend asking me to hurry or he’ll leave – Afraid of success
Throwing soiled toilet paper at my friend – An exchange of gifts

So what does it all mean? Good question. Using some very valid/nonsensical online resources, I can tell it’s all very good/bad. Apparently, I either stand to inherit a good bit of wealth or I’m doomed to roam the world sad and dead. It’s really all up to interpretation.

New Tattoo For You Plus Two A.K.A The Jackalope

Animal, Food, Life Lessons, Story No Responses »

Dec 142009

Things to consider when getting a tattoo:

1. The tattoo has a unique story behind it

2. You have no personal biases against tattoos

3. The tattoo incorporates pancakes

The vegetarian diet of a butterly makes its magic look like poop

I’d never considered a tattoo. My wife has one of a magical butterfly and she resents it every day. I’ve always been told modifying the body in such an unnatural way goes against the Jewish religion (a faith I used to subscribe to). And I’ve never seen a piece of art or cartoon that I loved so badly as to prominently display it on my human flesh. From this, I can say that without a doubt, I’m not much of a “tattoo guy”. That was until Saturday night.

I spent several really good hours this weekend at my friend’s wedding–for the sake of naming names, let’s call the wedding the union of A Wat and Mel Wat. It’s no big deal or nothin’ but the governor was there–for fun’s sake, I’m not gonna tell you which one. The ceremony was all churchy and nice and junk, but the reception is where things got all friggin’ awesome.

It was at said reception where I encountered a gentleman who, for the sake of anonymity, we’ll call C. Lav. Mr. Lav was kind enough to humor me with a wonderful anecdote from his past that has quite possibly altered my perception of tattoos and friendship for the rest of eternity.

The story begins with an innocent marriage proposal. C. Lav’s best friend, let’s call him B. Mav for the sake of this story, was to be wed to a woman. B. Mav was expecting a bachelor party to be held in his honor by his two very best friends, C. Lav and his other friend, for the sake of the story and for purposes of anonymity, we’ll call A. Nav.

To honor the time old tradition, C. Lav and A. Nav planned a party for B. Mav which entailed a trek across these late, great United States via passenger rail car from Denver to Chicago and then to Milwaukee and back again. B. Mav was excited for the journey as it was the popular style at the time.

It was in this honorable and timeless journey that the most incredible thing happened. Along the way, somewhere between here and there, the three decided to do something radical. Dazed from the toxins that one ingests during a bachelor party, the men wound up in a house of pancakes. (An international house, no less.)

It all started with a conversation about B. Mav’s reoccurring dream of a soaring hawk swooping down into a pond and, delivering to the sky a lily pad that was locked within the deadly clutches of his talons. As majestic and vivid as the dream seemed, it all sounded hokey and gay to A. Nav and C. Lav.

“Nobody’s going to recognize a tattoo of a lily pad, dude,” they said, “Why don’t you make it something cool that looks like a lily pad but is way cooler?”

As the three pondered the suggestion, they gathered ideas from their surroundings. What looks like a lily pad but is more stately and ultimately cooler? Pancakes!

B. Mav agreed to an artist’s depiction of a hawk soaring above pancakes so long as C. Lav and A. Nav also plated a tattoo incorporating pancakes. And so it was.

Pokey the Unicorn in all his majesty

The boys embarked on a second journey…to get tattoos of pancakes. On their way, A. Nav and C. Lav decided what tattoos to get. A. Nav decided on a beast that represents mystic wisdom and grandeur hurdling a short stack…he picked a unicorn. This was no ordinary unicorn, however. It was an expression of his boyhood hero, Pokey from the claymation cartoon series, “Gumby”.

C. Lav went for another creature of mystic proportions. He picked a creature more elusive than the unicorn…one that had captivated his imagination ever since seeing the head of one prominently displayed on the wall of an Applebee’s. He chose the mighty jackalope making quick work of pancakes.

So it came to be that these three best of friends would be joined spiritually and emotionally with iconic beasts and their pancakes tattooed to their skin for all time.

Afterwards, they traveled home only to share their tale with trusted contemporaries. I enjoyed the story very much but was skeptical. Determined to prove his anecdote, C. Lav took me to the bathroom and exposed me to the markings of his hind quarter. It is with great pleasure that I share the glory with you, my faithful readership. I give you what must simply be called the Jackalope…

The Jackalope

This representation changes my perception of tattoos all together. I anticipate the day when I can vandalize my skin with the same creative display as C. Lav. I can only hope that it comes out of the same love and passion that only best friends can share. Thanks for the story, buddy.

Do you have a tattoo story that you love, or hate? Feel free to share it in your comments…

10 Reasons I Should Get A Job

10 Reasons, Animal, family, Half-ass, Hate, Life Lessons, The Future, work 4 Responses »

Dec 112009

About three months ago, I decided that quitting my sh*tty job would be a good idea. Even though the action temporarily halted my night terrors and self-mutilation, it has led to a host of other problems. I have since been diagnosed and treated for depression and a disease simply known as the gay. These ailments have caused me a host of other problems that I could not have predicted. Tension is mounting between my wife and me as I sit at home all day. Despite my reluctance, there seems to be only one solution; I should get to f*cking work. Here, then, are 10 reasons that I should get a job:

10. A job provides an opportunity to have money, to give back to society, have a bigger purpose in life, meet new people and be mad at something other than my wife and the house cat

"I've been workforce ready since my conception"

9. There are no more dishes to clean and the floors are as swept as they’ll ever be

8. The fern I planted to provide me with a sense of fruitfulness and hope has died

7. Water cooler talk about Seinfeld reruns is turning me into a schizophrenic

6. I’ve been taking public buses just to see where their routes end

5. Investing money in my home business of cashing in on the Internet has amounted to numerous porn site subscriptions and dozens of pills that combat erectile dysfunction

4. My home office consists of a barcalounger, a box of colored pencils and a guitar I plan on learning

3. Anticipation of checking the mail keeps me up all night

2. Getting drinks “after work” starts at nine in the morning

-and, finally-

1. I spend more money than my wife makes

Karen O…Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs, Baby!

67db, Life Lessons No Responses »

Dec 102009

Led by pianist and vocalist, Karen O, drummer, Brian Chase and guitarist/keyboardist, Nick Zinner, the Yeah Yeah Yeahs are one of my favorite bands. By the time I’d learned of the Yeah Yeah Yeahs around 2006, they’d already done some pretty big things.

Their first two records, Fever to Tell (2003) and Show Your Bones (2006) produced a sound that stands alone. Unique? Yes. Eerily catchy and inspiring? Absolutely. In fact, last month, the album, Fever to Tell, was named as one of the top five albums of this decade by the UK’s New Musical Express Magazine.

Not surprising, I was completely sold on the Yeah Yeah Yeahs when I first heard a few of their biggest tracks (“Gold Lion“, “Cheated Hearts“, “Warrior“, and “Maps“). The release of the Yeah Yeah Yeah’s third album, It’s Blitz!, in March of this year, has impressed me more than ever.

The Yeah Yeah Yeahs are one of the few bands that I’ve heard that thoroughly riles my blood. I’m talking riled as in Rage Against the Machine and Nirvana riled. But Yeah Yeah Yeah’s rile is a completely different kind of animal.

Their energy can move you and floor you all at the same time. The Yeah Yeah Yeahs invoke such a strong energy within me that when I first heard “Skeletons“, I teared up. After that I ran five and a half miles and passed out.

The music is like a quiet storm that moves in slow and fierce. When the sound storm arrives, the listener is barraged with a style of synthesized rock that is like no other. The drums are crisp. The guitar riffs are subtle. Karen O’s vocals twist and careen between pitch, volume, octave and cadence, thus thrilling and awing the listener.

I can say with honesty there is not a single track on It’s Blitz! that I dislike. ”Heads Will Roll” has gained the most attention in the mainstream. You certainly can’t go wrong with “Runaway“, the aforementioned “Skeletons”, “Little Shadow“, or the hard hitting “Dull Life“.

The Yeah Yeah Yeahs have brought it time and time again. The group’s music with Karen O (yeah, baby) at the helm invigorates strong emotion. I encourage you to get a copy of It’s Blitz! if you haven’t already. This is one of my favorite albums of the year and possibly of all time. I hope you enjoy.

Oh, and be sure to keep your ear out for Karen O’s participation in the soundtrack for the motion picture, Where the Wild Things Are.

Posted via {{web}} from {{67db}}

My Monolith

67db, Life Lessons No Responses »

Dec 102009

This past weekend, I attended an event at Red Rocks Amphitheater in Morrison, CO. The Monolith Festival, an enlightening and entertaining two day concert event, consisted of four stages and dozens of bands. I didn’t originally plan on attending Monolith, but after some gentle prodding, Steve B. was able to convince me to look around for a ticket. I joined Steve and a moderately hungover, Alex, for the second day of the fest. I found out which bands were playing and determined that I didn’t know many of the acts. Regardless of my naivete, I attended happily. What I learned that day, will stick with me forever.

Steve B. squinting pirate-like with his first mate, Alex.

In the standard band construction, you will almost certainly see a set of drums, rhythm guitar, bass guitar, and a lead (guitar, vocals, piano). Steve called it four-by-four music. Not at Monolith. If I had to describe it, Monolith showcased non-traditional groups. In addition to the basic elements of traditional bands, the groups we saw added percussionists, extra drummers, and electronic instruments like turntables, controller pads, and synthesizers. It was music production and artist performance from out of this world.

Because of my unfamiliarity with the artists, I had Steve lead the way. The first band we happened across was a trio called Monotonix. The band was set up in the middle of the crowd. The lead singer donned a handlebar moustache and long curly hair. He was only wearing shoes and a pair of short red velvety running shorts (and I still think he felt overdressed). Monotonix’s hard bass lines and heavy drumming just barely drowned out the lead singer’s guttural anthems as crowd members literally raised him up high on a pedestal while he “sang”. He resorted to mooning the crowd and spit on several people. It was awesome! Here are the other performances we saw:

After that, we ventured around stopping in to hear sets performed by bands like Health (heavy hitting guitar power-chords backed by two drummers – rhythm and lead);

The Dandy Warhols (a rock band supported by trance inducing electronica and soothing melody);

Red Man and Method Man (two rappers from the Wutang Clan coarsely rapping to hip-hop tracks);

The Glitch Mob (Four dudes with controller pads and one on a turn table mixing tracks into rhythmic beats);

Passion Pit (falsetto vocals backed by techno dance tracks, keyboard, drums and guitar);

Phoenix (synthy beats combined with countertenor vocals, keyboard and drums);

And, finally, The Mars Volta (the main event). I thought The Mars Volta were exemplary. TMV manipulated extremely complicated guitar riffs, unbelievably fast drum beats, jazz piano, percussion, bass, and alto vocals to create both heavy hitting rock songs and soothing jamband-esque drama. Each element contributed fully even though it could possibly stand alone. The lead singer, Cedric Bixler-Zavala, resorted to many tricks of his own, maintaining seemingly falsetto vocals while performing ametuer acrobatics and microphone handling tricks. Omar Rodríguez-López , on lead guitar, was amazingly fierce and graceful. Like a fine cognac or caviar, TMV is an acquired taste. Not because it’s repulsive, but because the music is wonderfully layered and complex. There is a lot going on in their songs but somehow the individual sounds are perfectly married.

The festival was a great experience and it really opened my ears to a culture I was completely mystified by. I learned a lot about a genre of music that I’ve only begun to appreciate. I’m glad that I attended and plan on following the bands that blew my mind.

Posted via {{web}} from {{67db}}

Regina Spektor – Far

67db, Life Lessons No Responses »

Dec 102009

Listening to Regina Spektor’s latest album, Far (Release: June 23, 2009), leaves the listener feeling as if he just spent a day making a friend. The lyrics are as simple and whimsical as casual conversation or story telling. However, for as simple as her words sound, they carry the weight and complexity we all experience when lost in thought. An element of honesty is born from the intimacy. This experience is made even more intriguing when paired with her piano. Listening to any of the album’s songs reveals that she is a very talented piano player. Her ability to play showcases her true love for the instrument and how much fun she is having. This invites the listener in even more. The true value of Spektor’s songs comes when the piano is paired with her voice. The inflection from her vocals match the rhythmic bounciness of her piano skills. Her words bounce and float along with the notes as the tempo gracefully changes. At times she even uses the just sounds of words to compliment the melody (Listen to ”Eet” below). By bringing the listener in on a personal level, Spektor is able to convey the obscurity and fun of her message. Far is a good album and is very pleasing to listen to if ever a fun and honest friend was needed.

To get better acquainted with her style, I suggest warming up with these songs from Regina Spektor’s album, Far:

“Eet” (with accompanying National Public Radio review)

http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=105823657&ps=rs

“Laughing With”

Ray LaMontagne Will Take You to Hell and Back

67db, Life Lessons No Responses »

Dec 102009

If you’re looking for a set of lyrics to grab your soul by the short and curlies, go no further than Ray LaMontagne’s, “Empty”. From his Gossip in the Grain album (release October, 2008), “Empty” mixes the chug-along strum of the acoustic guitar and LaMontagne’s raspy voice to create a classic folk rock sound. The addition of a pedal steel guitar and a dark story really exemplifies this song. LaMontagne turns this soothing melody into a dark and twisted tale that deserves a listen.

On the face, “Empty” leads the listener to believe that the song’s message is a man’s struggle to reclaim the love he once had for a woman. It seems their love dissapates when feelings of emptiness emerge. On deeper analysis, my sense is that in his love for this woman, he struggles to love her while embracing his dark and depressed mind. Recognizing his depression, the woman tries to shine light upon him through his battle. He feels her attempts to make him happy as deceptive and longs for her honesty. To him, her gestures are defiant to his nature and they increasingly cause conflict within him. As many times as he’s tried to see the brighter side, he knows that he prefers a hollow feeling. He has attempted to fight his demons before to no avail and he will always see the world as dark and dreadful. Comfortable with self loathing, their love quietly fades away as he remains “so empty…so estranged”.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ray_lamontagne

Posted via {{web}} from {{67db}}

Hot Shot Cat

Animal, family, Tookie 4 Responses »

Dec 092009

Hotter than a fat chick at a holiday sweater party. Yee Haw!

From Cat Photos

Tookie is my cat. When it gets cold outside (subzero temps and other temperatures ), Tookie hides in the warmest part of the house. Normally, he lays on our guest bed underneath a heat register that rains warmth upon him when the furnace kicks on. That rarely happens.

Because I’m out of work and JDubs and I don’t like wasting money on energy, the furnace is set at a cool 62 degrees F. That invariably means that our house is f-f-f-freezing. I can get by with an extra layer or ten. But even with a thicket of cat fur and a big F.U.P.A., the cat can’t get warm. He is cool to the touch even when balled up in his spot under the heat.

Every once in a while, I’ll cave. ”It’s too cold,” I’ll say. Instead of turning up the furnace, however, I’ll turn on a little space heater that JDubs bought. She got it at an after winter sales event at Target (we’re talking 90% off this heater…what a Jewy kind of deal!). The money saved on the device warrants splurging on electricity. So, that’s what I do.

All of a sudden Tookie has a new favorite spot…where ever the space heater is. It’s really hot but he curls up in front of it anyway. Here’s a video to show how comfortable he is:

Sorry for the sideways filming, porno-style handy cam work and the water mark…I’m only pretty good at this stuff, not really good.

Bless This Sex

Animal, Ball Sport, Hot Chicks, Life Lessons, love 8 Responses »

Dec 072009

Lets take this a step farther, Evolution said to the monkeys.

"Let's take this thing a step farther," Evolution said to the monkeys.

There’s no doubt about it…I know sex. I’m expert in hot, naked relations with other humans. My expertise comes from years of field research and years of hocking sexy (used) wares and information around town to prepubescent teens.

Before that, I voluntarily trained in the mystic arts of “sex safety practices and proper penile insertion techniques.” It was for college credit.

Today, I’m here to tell you that power of great sex can be yours by simply following and practicing a few guidelines. Soon, you will be showcasing your sexual prowess like a boner in sweatpants.

The first step to having the best sexual experiences of your life is honesty with yourself. Learning what your mildly crazy and dangerous side wants out of sex is half the battle. The other half is listening to that craziness. And the third half is accepting it’s okay to want and have those things. You want missionary, that’s great. You want fisting, fantastic. You want anal with a pocket knife, have fun.

The second step is starting and maintaining great communication with other people. Got it? Great…next point.

The third step, and this is important, is trust. Trust starts by building a strong foundation on reciprocating information through active listening will open the door to the best sexy (or bexy) encounters of your life. No foundation means no trust. For example, if you don’t listen to me, I can’t trust that you know that the safe word is “polyester pajama hat.” All of a sudden you’re looking at 15-20 years for rape.

So, there you have it. Find out what you want. Tell someone that you can trust. Get crazy. It’s that easy. If you’re having trouble figuring out what you want, see the list of activities below.

Rate how willing you are to try each one (Afterwards, have your partner(s)/sheep(s) fill one out too and compare. Just discus the activities that match up and get crazy.).

Directions:

Rate these sexual activities in order of your willingness to do them and then share with your partner. Use these four rankings:

“I will absolutely do that”, “I would try that”, “I would never do that…with you”, “I would never do that”.

Conversation at a Table Conversation in the Nude

Role Play Naked Spooning

Erotic Massage Mouth Kissing

Kissing the Body Using Toys

Touching Genitals Using Food

Blowing Genitals with Open Mouth and Hand (Cunnilingus/Fellatio/Hand Jobbing)

Fisting Missionary Position

Doggy Style Position Cowgirl/Reverse Cowgirl Position

T-Square Pile Driver

Rusty Bike Pump Anal Insertion/Licking (Anilingous)

Stimulation Using Props Introducing Another Person

Introducing Yet Another Person/Group of Persons

Trapeze Bondage

Filming a Sexual Session Selling that Tape for Profit

Introducing Animals/Midgets Introducing a Street Performer/Busker

Prostitution Physical Manipulation/Abuse

Using a Condom Marriage

10 Reasons The Clitoris Is So Elusive

10 Reasons, Hot Chicks, work, World's Worst No Responses »

Dec 042009

There's no getting around 'it' because you don't know where 'it' is

I don’t know about you, but one of the most stimulating parts of intercourse is satisfying your partner. If you’re like me or any member of an all-girl softball team, then most of your sex is going to be with a woman. There is no greater reciprocation of mutual respect than offering a resounding “OH YES!!” to your woman/women.

From my experiences as a medical doctor and sexual predator, I can tell you that the orgasm you give to your lady comes from stimulation of her clitoris: a mysterious nub button within the confines of a human’s labia majora. However, even though I know it’s there, and she knows it’s there, and the camera man knows it there, the clitoris evades me sometimes.

A buddy of mine told me once about “eating out” with a friend one evening. What he thought was a nice serving turned into an audible “sigh” of discomfort from his lady friend. Apparently, the clam cake appetizer didn’t come to the table at all. That one sigh set the pace for the entire course. He said that he had his dessert alone in a corner with chocolate sauce for lube and a bus boy’s apron for clean up.

My friend’s (and his lady’s) misfortunes led me to ask the question: At the most crucial times, why is the clitoris so elusive? Here are 10 reasons I came up with to explain…

10. It was circumcised in an act of religious persecution (so sad )

9. Her mother is a turtle and it’s hiding

8. She’s in labor and you’re spreading her baby’s cleft lip

7. Her father is a groundhog and fears its own shadow (thanks, Sean)

6. The man in the little boat finally set sail

5. She’s a man with big hairy man parts

4. You’re poking around in the wrong hole

3. She’s wearing parachute pants

2. She’s an amputee from the neck down

-and, finally-

1. You can lick around until your tongue turns raw, but you have no idea what you’re looking for

Little People, Big Problem

Hate, kids, Life Lessons, World's Worst 2 Responses »

Dec 022009

I’ve been glued to TLC’s Little People, Big World for the last three years. Unfortunately, I’ve only focused on the corrupt and small handed nature of little people.

They always seem bitter because things didn’t work out the way they wanted. As a result, I adopted a bad attitude whenever I thought of short people.

I’m not going to hold that against them, though. My biases are simply constructed from a combination of life experience and my father’s violent spats stemming from rampant alcohol abuse. That’s not fair…technically, little people didn’t do anything (I gather this is because of the physical limitations of their bodies). Instead, I wanted to get past this judgment when I thought of this whole race of people.

As a tall person with all the advantages, I wanted to visualize where these shorties were coming from. Do tall people really get more out of life than little people?

My first response was “hell yes”. But, once again, that wasn’t fair. Sure, we tall folk get to ride all the big rides and pick fruit from our favorite fruit trees, but we’re at some disadvantage here, too.

Not since my childhood will I ever again know the joys/urine smell of a ball pit. I will never successfully tunnel out of prison using the conveniently misplaced duct work in my jail cell. My torso is just too long. And never shall there be a time when I will fit inside a cupboard.

Am I bitter about this? Not really. When life hands you lemon trees, you reach up and pick the fruit…and then share your bounty with the less fortunate ground foragers.

Acceptance is the first step to contentment. Volleyball can be a spectator sport. You don’t always have to reach the gas pedal to get a ride. My great-grandfather was short and he was the mayor of an entire province city town township village barn community place. Little people are inspiring and watching them “grow” builds character.

From this analysis, I gather that my perspective is skewed. The negativity that I focus on from Little People, Big World is all part of the show. My opinion is that TLC produces a spectacle that showcases the disadvantages of little people. The network capitalizes on the drama of these people’s lives.

And if you ask me, that’s the real shame. Exploiting people for ratings and money is no better than trading slaves or killing puppies. That’s more of an MTV thing to me. I think I’ll save judgment for the sluts and ‘tards on The Hills.

S	M	T	W	T	F	S
« Nov				Jan »
		1	2	3	4	5
6	7	8	9	10	11	12
13	14	15	16	17	18	19
20	21	22	23	24	25	26
27	28	29	30	31

Wolsamnoraa's Blog

Medical Marijuana

Dream Analysis

New Tattoo For You Plus Two A.K.A The Jackalope

10 Reasons I Should Get A Job

Karen O…Yeah, Yeah, Yeahs, Baby!

My Monolith

Regina Spektor – Far

Ray LaMontagne Will Take You to Hell and Back

Hot Shot Cat

Bless This Sex

10 Reasons The Clitoris Is So Elusive

Little People, Big Problem

What Day Is It?

Blogroll

Categories

Recent Comments

Archives

Wolsamnoraa RSS Feed

Here’s a Sweet Tweet for You

Recent Posts