Apr 152010
We had a pet squirrel when I was growing up and I accidentally forgot to feed it for a month (well, just short of a month actually, he died). Feel free to insert your favorite nut pun or cache joke. A pet like that, you have to feed everyday and that’s why people say:
“Squirrels make terrible pets.”
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That is HORRIBLE. How could you even think that’s funny? And what animal DOESN’T need to be fed everyday? In my opinion, you are an AWFUL person. No living creature should have to starve because some asshole locked it in a cage and couldn’t have the decency to remember it needed FOOD to LIVE. AND, I bet when you DID manage to feed the poor thing, all it got was nuts. Poor animal. I hope it’s reincarnated as a grizzly bear that attacks and kills you. Or maybe a kidnapper who locks YOU up and FORGETS TO FEED YOU!
That’s a bold assumption thinking my pet squirrel lived in a cage. In fact, he lived outside in a tree made of wood. We just tamed him up a bit with some simple hand feeding. Opportunities for him to eat were countable. His failed attempts to eat were merely a result of being paralyzed from getting hit by a car. For the record, I’m only as awful as you make me seem.