Quip and Quote

Quip & Quote

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Feb 062012
 

Good business starts by wielding a big knife.

To run a good business only takes a little capital, a little know how, a little gumption, a good business sense, a background in management, a strong understanding of people, a knowledge of the markets, a little bookkeeping experience, a smidgen of SEO and marketing skill, a lackluster personal life, a tad bit of grit in governmental regulation, a small thirst for money, a crap ton of luck, etc. Successful CEO’s know that like a fine automobile, what goes into the engine will dictate what comes out. Surprisingly, most businesses don’t make it. I guess people put a lot of sh*t in the tank and that’s why there’s this gem:

“Garbage in, garbage out.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 11:36 am

Quip & Quote

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Apr 152010
 

We had a pet squirrel when I was growing up and I accidentally forgot to feed it for a month (well, just short of a month actually, he died).  Feel free to insert your favorite nut pun or cache joke.  A pet like that, you have to feed everyday and that’s why people say:

“Squirrels make terrible pets.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 6:27 am  Tagged with: , , , , ,

Quip & Quote

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Apr 122010
 

image

Just as a receding tide can mean a tsunami is coming and a penis in a porn can mean a man is cumming, seeing signs of danger is indicates that there is no way of avoiding certain doom. That is why we usually say:

“If you can see it, it’s already too late.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 12:30 pm  Tagged with: , , , ,

Quip & Quote

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Apr 082010
 

Mastering your life skills takes hard work and dedication.  Sometimes the payoff for your efforts comes all at once or over the course of your life in little spurts.  That’s why this phrase was coined:

“A perfected stroke is as crucial to genius as it is to masturbation.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 6:41 am  Tagged with: , , , , ,

Quip & Quote

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Apr 052010
 

Love is one of those things that no one, especially you, will ever manage to get right.  You will miraculously gain your lover’s trust only to destroy it time and time again and that is why there’s this old standby:

“Never screw a woman you intend to love.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 7:31 pm  Tagged with: , , , ,

Quip & Quote

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Apr 022010
 

Because you’re a schmuck, you know how easy it is to fall off course pursuing goals when you fail to prepare yourself.  It’s the reason for this quote:

“Never jockey a humpless camel.”


 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 7:42 am  Tagged with: , , ,

Something New: Quip & Quote

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Mar 312010
 

These damn mutts are so wet

If you’ve been following this blog (and there is no doubt in my mind that you haven’t…Google Analytics tells all!), then there is a good chance you’ve noticed a lot of bullsh*t.  No, this blog doesn’t answer life’s little riddles and it doesn’t try to sell you something that you really need.  What it does is entertain in the most absurd way.  Nearly everything you see here is an invention of my scattered brain or a fantastic reaction to the world around me.

The trouble with maintaining that schematic is that while ideas for content are seemingly limitless, for me, they flow like mud.  It occurred to me that I can counter my lackluster approach to content entry by adding a series of themed posts.  I call it “Quip & Quote” and  I will post it as often as there are days that I post.

I will create a quote like quote that will become an instant classic and then explain it with a short quip or cutting jest.  It might be as profound as it is profane or not.  It’s going to be something that you’ll think you’ve heard before, but will be as original and fresh as store bought bananas.  So sit back, open your eyes and your heart.  I’m about to take you for a ride.

Quip & Quote:

A person with a negative attitude is attributed by a unwillingness to change and the title of Douche Bag.  That is why in this instance, we say:

“A wet stick is not easily broken.”

 Posted by wolsamnoraa at 6:53 am  Tagged with: , , , , ,
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